88 - March 28

I look gross today - and this was before the humidity caught up to me. Erm. Again, it was a substitute kind of day, so basically first and second period were very chill. At lunch, there was a band playing - Joe Brooks? Idk, it was something like that. I still never understand why people come and perform at our cafeteria during lunch; high school kids are disrespectful. The highlight of my day was probably that I got the highest grade in the class on one of our AP Lit practice tests, but the downside was that everyone hates me because it set the curve. Also I pretty much bombed my Econ test. Senioritis ftw!

I am also looking for any distractions from my recent ~heartbreak~ lol. I am fickle.

87 - March 27

Nothing noteworthy about today, except that it rained a little! Sigh.

86 - March 26

I was very moody today, probably due to my Aunt Flo making her dreaded visit. My physics teacher was gone, presumably because his wife has given birth, so we had this terrible substitute who knew nothing about the subject but insisted on teaching anyways. He made us go up and write answers on the board and I ended up being humiliated because I had the wrong answer and he insisted on making me stand up there while everyone corrected my idiot mistakes. Also I realized that maybe I'm not so okay with some of the things that have been going on. I'm just going to have to continue being positive. After all, there still is too much to be thankful for.

85

I didn't do anything today.

84

Let March 24, 2012 forever be known as the day that the California State championship was stolen from the Sheldon Huskies.

Just kidding. Well, kind of. As a totally fair member of the audience I'm pretty sure that the refs were paid off. They fouled out FOUR of FIVE of our starting line-up, man, and only a couple of fouls were called on the other team. Hrm. I was upset and the crowd was rowdy so it was all good. I love loud crowds almost more than the game itself. I also road the ghetto-bus to Power Balance and back so it was cooo. And beforehand I went with the girls to Chipotle nom. So, I mean, it was a pretty good day overall.

83

I witnessed my very last multicultural rally of my high school career today *sobs*. Honestly, the multicultural rally has been one of my favorite things about my school throughout all four years. It's cool seeing just how crazy diverse my school is and how all the clubs come together to showcase that .. and I like getting out of class for a while. You know. The rally was actually really good this year, I give them props. And at the end the basketball team came out and we got all pumped up again (did i mention we're going to state tomorrow?!?). Well, because of the weird rally during first period all the classes were mixed up and it was generally confusing and nobody wanted to do anything in class anyways. After fourth, I ran some "errands" around school including buying the pre-sale ticket for the game! Ugh I don't think I've ever been this excited for anything.

After school I just chilled and was ready to take a nap when my dad told me that my cousins were going to come pick me up to the go their weekly youth-night thang. I was really unwilling at first but after a while of being there I was thankful. I've never really felt connected during church, or I haven't in too long, so it was refreshing and inspirational. It was awkward being there because half of the kids I didn't know and the other half were people who I've grown up with but who I've pushed away (I feel like I've said this before). But again, it was worth it, even despite the many teenage boys there who used the words "swag" and "yolo" in all seriousness and kendama-d to their hearts' content.

82

Oh. Um. Hey guys. Yeah, I have no excuses whatsoever. I am pathetic and I'll go back and update the days which I can actually remember things happening, but. Er. Yeah. Also I think the only reason why I'm even uploading this is because I'm trying to procrastinate from doing my actual homework! I really do not know how I'm going to make it to the end of the school year.

Anyways. School was alright. My physics teacher was absent so we had the Mexican sub who is forever telling scary stories with the lights off and making me pee my pants. I got incredibly irritated during lunch, though. There's this really narrow portion of the cafeteria that they wall off, and there are two lines in it which lead to the Chinese food line and the taco/nacho line, and these are always the two slowest-moving lines so naturally I try to get there as early as possible. But the nacho line is always longer than the Chinese food line, so rude people are always going into the Chinese line to get to the end and then "changing their minds" and cutting in front of everyone who waits their turn. Today it was super bad and ugh. Getting somewhat-quality food at my school is so much more stressful than it has to be. On a brighter note, today was "Gender-bender" day and I got to see some guys in really entertaining feminine attire. After school I stayed after for test corrections in Econ and discussed my college future with my friends who're also going to Davis! I really feel like my future is coming together and I'm still scared but now that I have my acceptance I'm actually really excited.

81

I woke up to the news that there was a fire at my school. Unfortunately, it was retained to one just one isolated building so school wasn't let out indefinitely (joking, obv). The irony lies in the fact that it was the detention room that got burned, and they suspect it was arson. I feel like maybe we should set that person on fire. We don't have any money man!

80

It was very chill today. I had a "quest" in physics and then we played around with his electric shock mechanism thingy. In second period I was working during the blood drive and I did absolutely nothing but sit around and eat the provided food under the disapproving eye of the Bloodsource lady and hand out stickers and T-shirts and cringe at the copious amounts of blood. English and Econ were irrelevant inconveniences as usual.

79

It was a great day, and a lot of that rests in the fact that one of my best friends is most likely going to Davis. Pretty much all the kids in my classes, especially the Biotech kids, have basically given up on school. As long as  I don't get a D, they're not going to take my acceptance away, so I mean I'm kind of loosening my strictness on myself and not letting anything bother me. Literally nothing. I got some news which would have probably ruined me prior to Friday, but I actually care very little now! I have two months to go; shit don't faze me! There are way too many good things to look forward to, and the posters plastered all over the walls about the game this Saturday and the juniors campaigning for next year are just a constant reminder of that.

78

I went to the church in which I grew up today, since my uncle was preaching there. It always makes me a little sad and awkward going here because I definitely grew up with these people (many of who are my own age) and a lot of them are family, but after my parents decided to relocate to another, I pushed everyone away as usual and became that weird girl who sits in the corner during all the family parties. But even though everything from the people to the interior has changed, I still feel like this small family church is mine, not the huge one we go to every Sunday with too many people and no friends. Anywho, it was a very nice service and I was inspired, as usual. It was amazing to see how much these young people have grown in their faith and it inspired me to do the same, as well.

After, we went out with my uncles and aunt and grandma and grandpa to Chipotle, which was bomb as usual. When we got home, I tried to watch a bit of March Madness but knocked out almost as soon as I lay down, so that was kind of a fail. I woke up to voices in the kitchen and learned that we were having a barbecue. Eventually everyone came and I ate and talked and played foosball and whatnot with my cousins. Also my seven-year-old niece stole my phone and texted my friends haha. Good day overall, the only downside being that I had school the next day. Booo.

77

Erm hello this is my new best friend. But I suppose, to tell that story, I'll have to give you some background ..

My uncle is visiting us from the Philippines, and as every NorCal resident knows, there is nothing to show these people but the bay area. So today we took a family field trip with him and my aunt and uncle to my favorite city in the entire world, San Francisco! The first stop was the pier, and I was just chilling with my brobro while the old people took pictures of the sea lions that hang out in groups and stuff when he was like "Erica, look!" and I look and I see this lone sea lion swimming on the opposite side of the pier. And we got all excited and got closer and then it dived under and we were all disappointed until it surfaced right underneath us basically. And when I said hi, that sea lion smiled at me and then floated casually staring up at me while I talked and cooed to it because basically I am the Sea Lion Whisperer. But then my mom came to see what we were staring at and it went away sob. Still, that was a crazy ass experience because stupid as it sounds I feel like I connected with him in some way.

The rest of the trip was not so eventful. We went to find the Jollibee but found that it was closed, so we headed to Daly City to go to the Jollibee there but it was hella crowded as usual so we just ended up at L&L eating sub-par Hawaiian food. And after that I fell asleep in the car but apparently we stopped by the Golden Gate Bridge before heading home. We went to my aunt & uncle's house for a while, then to Pho Dynasty again for food. I was pretty upset that I missed the NorCal Final game, but GUESS WHAT. WE WON. HUSKY NATION BABY. We're going to state and it's the first time my school has ever felt any kind of collective school spirit and UGH. The best weekend.

76

So, um.

Guess who got accepted into her dream school?! 


Freaking out. I. Am. Freaking. Out. Looks like this time next year I'll be strolling around UC Davis! I can't even. This is the best news I've ever had. I finally feel like my hours and days and weeks and months and years spent working my ass off for this have paid off.

I don't even know what to say anymore. askdjfl;jfsdfadf

75

Busy busy busy. After school today I headed over to my old elementary school because Biotech was doing a science fair grading and I need community service hours/ Biotech activities. That took a while, but it was okay because Ritz.

After I finished, my dad and brother picked me up and then we went to my uncle's house because my dad's cousin is visiting from the Philippines and he hasn't seen him in about thirty years. Had a good time with the family and ate some good food, watched some whack March Madness games haha.

When I got home, I found out that I got admitted into UC Santa Cruz! Excitement and trepidation!

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68 / 366

I literally do not know when I took this picture. I can't remember. But I like my hair so there you gooo.

We had a rally today, so classes were all a bit shorter than usual. I'm feeling increasingly sorry for my teachers as the year winds down and the weather gets better and the students stop caring. Numerous times I found myself making sad faces as they tried desperately to get their classes into order lulz. Physics is always fun times, probably because literally everyone in that class is a weirdo in some way. I guess I was put there for a reason! I also unwillingly entered a wet T-shirt competition when this kid just started spraying me with the water bottle the teacher uses to clean the whiteboards. It's a good thing I was wearing black (school spirit days, whaat!). Ummm. I wrote my first timed essay in months in English! My right hand is still recovering. And then the rest was just as boring as usual. The black-light rally after school was pretty good, but l have to say, last year's was better to me. That's probably because it was the first one I'd ever been to (and also the first one the school's had in ten years) and it was the day before junior prom so it was much more exciting to me than it probably otherwise would have been. The prom thing still applies to this year, though, so that probably explains the juniors' wild excitement on the other side of the gym. Also I have come to the  conclusion (yet again) that my school is ratchet.

When I got home, I literally just lay in my parent's bed and watched Little House on the Prairie before getting online and doing this. This is such an exciting start to an exciting weekend! /sarcasm. Oh and I got my ID card today, HOLLA. I look ridiculous.

I feel like I should make this blog private or something. I don't know why, but it just occurred to me how creepy it would be to have just totally random people know about my daily ~struggles~. I don't think anyone really reads this, but unless the stats that blogger gives me are lying people are getting here in some straaaange ways.

67 / 366

Ugh. I'm having one of those days when I just hate my face and everything about it. I noticed that I hadn't posted any pictures on this blog for ages, so I went to just take a really fast one and I realized how ugly I've become lately. I think it's most closely related to the state of my skin; I've never felt so ugly before, and I've never had such extreme skin problems before. jkalsfjdkl.

Anyways. It felt like a Friday today, and so I kept on remembering it was actually Thursday and was a little bummed out each time. It's a spirit week and today was hippie day, so I don't know. I guess people thought it was totally cool to come to school hella baked (or pretend like they were) so I was incredibly distracted during all of my classes except English, because my teacher don't play haha. Also, I'm starting to remember just how much I enjoy literature. There's nothing like a healthy nerd-debate over syntax and diction to get your brain juices flowing, and I have a pretty good group in that class so I'm constantly being enlightened. Invisible Man is a ridiculouuuuus read now that I'm rereading it and looking closely at all the symbolism and whatnot; there's a deeper meaning behind pretty much every single sentence and it's so fun (for me) to try to piece it together. I really enjoy the English language okay. On the other hand, it's making me feel like crap about my own writing, so my novel is just going to the wayside, basically.

On a totally unrelated note, I was on Facebook today and I realized that it's my cousin's twenty-first birthday, and this is just ridiculous. He will always be the four-year-old kid who poked me in the eye when I was a baby and we were living in the same house. I'm getting to be crazy nostalgic.

ALSO. I don't know how I keep forgetting to mention this but there were some updates on Facebook so I've updated two posts with pictures .. I believe they were 20 and 41? I don't know, something like that. In case you wanted to be a stalker!

66 / 366

It is so strange to be writing this on the actual day that it occurs. My senioritis is infecting everything I touch. And honestly, I'm reading Urban Dictionary's definition of the term while I'm writing this, just to put it off a little longer. I'm a terrible person okay.

I had a meeting with my on-campus mentor for my senior project, and I had to tell him that I did not yet finish my novel haha. He was totally chill about it, though, which will most likely result in me slacking off until the very last day of the deadline. Not okay, Erica, not okay.

65 / 366

Tuesdays are definitely the most boring days of the week. I have absolutely nothing to say on this subject, except maybe that I'm enjoying doing half-assed work in my classes!

64 / 366

It was the start of the new term! More significantly, it was the start of the last term of my high school career. Yikes. It's so nerve-wracking to think that in about two months, I will have left this place behind me forever. I'm peeing my pants from the nerves and the excitement (mostly the nerves, though).

Also, this last term has apparently infected every single senior with an acute case of senioritis, because nobody was feeling the workload today -- and that includes myself. I believe I've fully mastered the art of sleeping while  taking notes/reading/pretending to listen to lectures/etc.

I am terrified, yet I can't wait. A change would be good for me, but I'm a very steadfast person. I don't know. I'll just have to deal with it as it comes, because I know it will be here sooner than I realize.

63 / 366

This was Sunday, right? Okay.

It was a church day for me, so I woke up early (still delirious about last night's win) and ate breakfast with the family before heading out. I may have fallen asleep once or twice (or continuously) throughout the whole sermon, I'm not sure ...

Afterwards we got some Chinese take-out from Eggroll Stix (?) and brought it home to watch the Knicks game, boohoo. And then ... I finally did my Invisible Man essay which I had nine weeks to complete. Advanced Procrastination for the win.

62 / 366

I was supposed to finish my novel for sure before I went out. However ... if I have learned anything about myself during the past two months it's that I can procrastinate really well and no amount of threatening myself is ever going to change that. I'll just have to accept myself for what it is. 

Today was a big day. HUGE. I mean, huge for anyone at my school who cares at all about the basketball team. Because today, we claimed the Division I Championship for the third time in the row. THREEPEAT! The school organized a couple of charter buses to take us to Power Balance, and my friends and I ended up riding in the bus with the cheerleaders. We were a little behind schedule so I was scared that we were going to be late and miss the first part of the game and be humiliated by all the Jesuits. However, the game in front of us (I think it was Division I Girl's?) went into double overtime, so we ended up being pretty early.

Before the game, the guys from Jesuit (who is our top rival school when it comes to basketball) were being total douches and it totally confirmed for me that private school kids are the baddest kids. There was so much disrespect going on but, hey, I guess we would be disrespectful to them too if we had lost seven games in a row to them including two Division I championship games! Pretty much the entire stadium was filled with their people, since I guess a lot of alumni showed up and their guys were coming out full-force. And their cheers were actually pretty intimidating since they're an all-boys school so there was all kinds of deep-voiced testosterone going on lol. However, no amount of pent-up man-hormones could let them win! Our boys are legacies, and everyone hates us haha. 

There was some sort of celebration in the bus on the way back which included dancing to whitepeoplesongs and generally being really obnoxious to the people that were sleeping. Sorry guys, but you really should be more pumped up. 

61 / 366

So today officially ends my last third term of my high school career! After this is my absolute last term and then I will be graduating. God the prospect is terrifying/exhilarating.

I only had one final today in Physics, which I think I did okay on. During my TA period I caught up on my reading for my AP English class since that's staring next Monday, oops. A nine week break definitely does not mean I'm going to get things done on time.

After school, Lenneris came over and we talked about our "relapsing" problems when it comes to boys. Seriously, boys suck and we suck. Somehow she ended up looking through my albums from when I was a kid and then we watched a VHS of me as a baby haha. Honestly, I just don't know. Then my dad came home and took me to the DMV so that I could get my ID picture taken for an ID card for when we go to Hawaii (!!! still so excited it's ridiculous). The wait was ridiculous of course, and I probably look like a fool but who really cares?

60 / 366

Today was the first day of finals! These are my grades before my teachers put the finals in, so obviously I really should have been studying instead of worrying about basketball yesterday, but it's too late for that now. I had my Gov and Econ tests today, and ... I don't want to jinx it so I won't say anything except that I could have spent a lot more time getting ready for it. It was also my last day of Gov and it was sad, even though I'm still TAing for him next term, because that was honestly my favorite class of the term and I sincerely do not want to be replacing it with English. Whoever decided that it was a good idea to put two huge two-hour tests back-to-back on finals day deserves to rot. Gov and Econ are my two hardest classes, too. Luckily, my Gov teacher was nice and played a little bit of Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon after our test to ease the burden a little. 

It was cold and sort of drizzly when I got out (early! the only good thing about finals) so I called my mommy because she started work late today and asked her to pick me up. Then I watched some ratchet Morgan Freeman film that was on the TV, took a nap, and wasted the rest of the day online as per usual. I feel like this post is really fragmented and makes no sense. I guess I've been writing too much and I've forgotten how to use the English language. I really should go study for Physics. 

59 / 366

Late start Wednesday, aye. I went to school early because I had test corrections for my Econ class. When school started, Sara and I had a very awkward conversation with one of our teachers haha. Um. In second period the class went to watch the Shakespeare Festival performance that they always have in our performing arts center, in which actors from Oregon (I think) come and do original or (obviously) Shakespeare plays. The original ones are usually pretty good, but this one was Macbeth, so I took it upon myself to take a nap. For third and fourth period, we played review games. In Gov it was vocabulary bingo and then the running game, which I'm pretty sure that I've mentioned it before. I didn't win anything; in fact, I kind of lost it for my team lol. Honestly, the kids in AP classes are ridiculous when it comes to winning some extra credit. Then in Econ, we "played" this trivia thing where we're divided into groups and text in the answers to questions he pulls up and yeah. It's not even a game, but it was for extra credit so it was worth it to participate, though I don't know who won yet.

Also, I know I should've been totally focused on writing my novel but I was distracted because I was watching out for updates about the semifinal basketball game that was going down at Power Balance Pavilion. We won! So the final game is on Saturday and it'll be against Jesuit! They're the team that we won against only by a tip-in the last time, so I'm anxious as hell and I really want to go! Not sure if the school's going to be organizing a charter bus this year or what, since we're poor now, so if not I'll have to find someone to give me a ride.

58 / 366

You know what's really sad? I can't remember a single thing about Tuesday, but I feel like there was something significant going on. Ugh.

57 / 366

I know that if I don't update this now, I'll continue to put it off and end up with an abandoned blog. I TOTALLY have an excuse this time but whatevs. You'll read about that later.

Monday was the start of finals week, so of course, it was all review and very boring. I learned something really disappointing about someone who I thought was a friend and I really can't get over it. I don't want to go into details because he really isn't worth it, but I'll just say that it's really fucked up to play with someone's feelings when you don't even know yourself what you're feeling.

In other news, I reached my hundred-page minimum on my novel! I'm not done, but I think I can start to relax a little now that I've met all the goals in time.

56 / 366

Today was pretty grim. I was planning on doing nothing but catching up on my novel/homework, but then my dad told me that we had to go to the hospital because my grandpa had a bad stomachache or something and winded up in the ICU. This has happened quite a few times in the past year alone, and every time we go to visit him I can't help but tearing up when he goes on about how he's probably going to go home to Jesus soon and that he's praying for me. I don't like talking about his mortality, especially when I see him lying there in the hospital bed and in those white sheets. The subject of my eighteenth birthday approaching was brought up, and when my grandma asked me if I was planning to have a party before we left for Hawaii, he started getting really excited and now I feel like I owe it to him to actually have one, even though I hate parties since nobody wants to celebrate my birth lol. I don't know, it just made me even more sad. I already lost one grandpa just two months ago, I don't need my last living grandparent to go.

We went to WinCo after, and then came home. I decided to watch Titanic because I was already sad and I'm on my period besides. So I shut myself up in my room and ~sobbed~. Gets me every time, and Leonardo DiCaprio was such a BABE back in his day. Haha I'm blaming this all on my menstrual cycle. Damn you ovaries!

55 / 366

w00t w00t for Fridays.

School was busy. I feel a little bad because for our rocket project in Physics which I mentioned earlier, we also have to write a paper which is worth one hundred points and yesterday I told the guy in our group to write it but then said I was kidding, and then today I asked him if he wrote the paper and he turned so red and probably almost had a heart attack until I produced the paper which I had written haha. I had two tests, both of which were in my AP classes so thank you for collaborating that guys. I went to sleep after my AP Gov test on my desk and was awoken by Sara placing a Thin Mint on my neck LOL. And I witnessed probably the most disgusting school PDA ever after school aw.

We had our very last home basketball game (and probably my very last home athletic event ever for high school *sob*) so Marissa picked me up and we arrived about thirty minutes early and just chilled in the gym waiting for it to start. I'm not going to lie, it was a pretty disappointing game, not because we lost -- because we won, of course -- but because our crowd had almost no energy. Regardless, we're one step closer to becoming division champs yet again!

54 / 366

I am useless at keeping this blog. We're just going to pretend that this is actually Thursday and not Saturday ok.

My mom told me that we're going to Hawaii this summer! I am SO. FREAKING. EXCITED. I'm sure it's not possible to be homesick for somewhere that you've only been to once and the one time that you did go you was when you were only two years old, but I am constantly daydreaming about going back to Oahu and visiting all the old haunts of my parents during their dating years. Every single day I question why my parents decided to move to The Middle of Nowhere, California, instead of staying in Hawaii and letting me grow up there. But all that aside, I could probably cry (although that's probably just due to PMS). I'm psyched to see my mom's side of the family, most of whom I've either seen only once or twice during their random visits here or who I haven't seen since I was two during the aforementioned trip (I feel like watching that particular VHS home video now). I don't even know how we can afford it but it's my dad's dream to go back and it just makes me even more happy!

53 / 366

Ayeeeee. I really like this shirt and also my ring ugh and shopping in general.

I'm trying to remember if there's anything about today worth writing about and nothing is immediately coming to mind, so I can only assume that there really was nothing happening. OH well it was actually sunny and fairly hot! It reached the mid-70's and it was torture to go inside. I'm still sad that we're apparently surpassing winter completely but, I mean, I live in California. Our winters are nothing but chill mornings and the occasional rainstorm anyways. It's almost shorts weather! Time to start working out :'c

I've kind of been hating myself lately, idk. I don't feel pretty or smart or anything anymore and I really have nothing to wake up for anymore. Haha why am I so undesirable. #firstworldproblems

52 / 366

Things that were notable:

• I tried Girl Scout cookies for the first time today! They were Caramel DeLites and they were delicious and I don't know why they haven't been in my life prior to this. 
• My shitty iPod Nano froze while I was trying to update it and I think it might be dead for good. SAD LYFE. Also isn't it funny that it froze while "Until the Day I Die" by Story of the Year was on the screen ha ha ha ha nice one universe. 

Aaaaaand yeah. 

51 / 366

No school today because of President's Day! I celebrated those great men by doing all of my government study guide and actually reading the entire chapter! I am so patriotic.

My dad still had work today, but when he got home we all went to Target and then to Seafood City, which is a Filipino supermarket type of thing in case you're unfamiliar with our fob ways. Usually it's full of hypebeasts but I guess it was too early for them because there were only old people today yay! Then we dropped my dad off at home so that he could take his nap and my mom, my brother, and I went to Tilly's. I am a bad person, I know, but THINGS WERE ON SALE so I had to buy them -- or rather, ask my mom to buy them for me. I have problems, I know.

50 / 366

Taking a break from novel-writing to update this! I am so bad at keeping this on track. So let's just pretend that I am actually writing this post yesterday!

It's Sunday, so I was woken up early by my parents with offerings of bacon and scrambled eggs so that we could head over to church. Before the service started, the lady sitting behind me complimented me on the earcuff which I bought yesterday at the Galleria awww. My mom said it looks weird and that she'd never seen anyone wear one before, but that is precisely why I like it!

We went to Chipotle for lunch and I got a steak burrito -- huge mistake. I don't like feeling so full, but I was raised to eat all the food on my plate (or rather, foil) and plus it was just so delicious. I think I'll stick with getting my usual bowl from now on. Properly stuffed, we went to Costco and my brother and I had fun being stereotypical Asians as per usual when we go there. And later that night I knocked off about four pages in three hours on my novel then, after my brother went to bed, I sobbed while watching Boys N The Hood for the first time. I'm definitely about to be on my period.

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Went to the Galleria today with Sara and her family! It was exhausting; that mall is far too big and I'm sure that its utter size violates health codes or something. I'd like to say I'm an experienced shopper, but the size of just the individual stores and the amount of clothing they had was overwhelming. I managed to find shorts, a tank, a ring and an ear cuff, though! I'm pretty satisfied with what I walked away with, but I was hoping that with all the selection that was forced upon me that I would actually find something amazing, and I still feel like I spent way too much of my earlygraduation money for the amount of things that I got, though. Also, the highlight of my day was probably when this ~skater kid~ was chilling outside the Forever 21 with his ~skater friends~ and he wheeled by us and said "you look sexy, just saying" and he was like twelve and I promptly told him so. Little boys make me laugh.

The first and second pictures were (of course) taken in the Apple Store, the third is of a terrible-quality photo booth in which me and Sara are in ~burning love~ hahaha, and the last is Sara's obviously failed attempt to take a picture of a guy at the food court who looked like Ray J. Good times.

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Friday! Based on my own personal judgments, it was a pretty good day. It started off lively with a fight outside of the cafeteria this morning -- I know, I am primitive. I found it hilarious how the "ghetto" people and the friends of the ones "fighting" ran as fast as they could to  circle them, while everyone else just casually strolled up to or past them. It was a refreshing start, anyways haha.

We launched our rockets in Physics! I don't know if I've mentioned this before but we've been working on building rockets out of cardstock and such and attaching a capsule that can hold and protect an egg as it falls. Our teacher specifically requested that we not use glitter in our decorations, buuuuut -- my group is badass and  used it anyways whatwhat. Our rocket is definitely prettiest; we're getting extra credit for that for sure. We almost won the highest launch, too, if it wasn't for our arch-nemesis-group! Our own launch was epic. The parachute didn't deploy at first and it was terrifying but then it poofed out at the last second and it was ~beautiful~. To top it off, the annoying know-it-all in my class tried out this really ~innovative~ design for his rocket which everyone was questioning and waiting for it to fail, which is did -- substantially. We all went around high-fiving each other, which I guess is pretty mean, but there's nothing more irritating than a cocky individual who always tries to take over the teaching of the class.

Also, I guess this wouldn't be a funny story if you weren't there, but ... okay, so my Gov teacher and my Econ teacher are BFF and they're always referring to each other as such and they are overall the cutest couple on campus. And today my Econ teacher was talking about one of his other "best friends" and we were all shocked that he had any others and then my Gov teacher walked in and heard him and he was like "OH MY GOD" and ran out of the rume presumably crying and my econ teacher was like "JOSH, WAIT!" and then he turns to us and he's like "Now I'll have to chase him all the way to the airport. That's how these movies usually end, right?" and yeah as I write this it doesn't sound funny but it was the most hilarious thing ever asldfka;jsfkl;.

I had some good Chinese takeout which made me crave some real Chinese food. I swear, if I go to Berkeley or SF State I will be going to China Town every weekend! Now I am sitting at home sad that I am not at the basketball game because everyone else is busy. Siiiiiiigh. I think I'll go trim my hurr.

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I wish I had something good, or at least interesting, to write about my day. I really do. But the only thing that was even vaguely significant today was that I got an email from CalGrants that told me that I didn't receive any. So if I can't somehow get a full-ride scholarship, it looks like I'll be going to community college next year.

46 / 366

Hey so um I was too lazy to write a proper post today so I asked my friend to do it for me and, well. This:

    deer bloq,
    today i realized chaz iz da best
    n dat she da one dat i tink about all da-a-ay
    also
    i reealized
    i shud tek inishitiv   
 bkuz a possible oppertuniti kame up 2day
    n i hav a way in
    tnx 2 mi fran sara
    n so im gnna do it
    bkuz itz da lass yr of hs
    so iv got nuttin 2 looz
    n erryting 2 gain
    esp hiz nice bod
    n cute smile
    n also im doin
    fantastik in all mi klassez
    k thx bai dat wuz my dai

So um. I guess that's what went down today. Not really how I remember it, but .. yeah. hahahaha. hi chaz. <3 

45 / 366

I'm not in a good mood today, and it's not even the fact that it's Valentine's day. To be honest, I'm not a totally bitter person when it comes to Valentines, so I don't know why I bitched about it so much today. I suppose it was just because I was pissed already for different reasons.

In physics, we finished our rocket project -- and I'm pretty sure that our egg will not survive when it falls hahaha whatever. It's still the prettiest in the class and that's all that really matters, right? I ran all across campus during second period feeling like a mobster because I was collecting money from teachers for Reed and he told me to threaten to break their legs if they didn't pay up. Aww and when I came back to my classroom I found a candy gram from Sara! My first and probably last candy gram ever but I still felt special. It's nice to not be completely forgotten and excluded haha. At lunch we went back to the physics room for a bit to put the finishing touches on our rocket and then okay I don't want to talk about the rest of my day because it's all blah blah blah and nobody cares anyways right?

44 / 366

                        

I come bearing pictures! Haha it's been a while. I stole these off of Josh's Facebook; he's such a good photographer :'D

I basically spent the day helping out my friend by modeling for her senior project, and this was (a part of) the result! I definitely think I should get this tatted permanently or something. When we finished with the shoot we drove around the Safeway parking lot scaring young children muahaha.

43 / 366

I didn't go to church today; I woke up late and I guess nobody else in the house wanted to bother either. So later in the afternoon, we went to eat lunch at Chile's, and I am still regretting eating so much. I get so mad at myself for eating crap but then I keep on doing it. I'm sure my body will punish me for it later on by blowing up into gigantic proportions.

Afterwards, we went to Target and picked up some things. I bought a couple of skincare products that I'm excited to try; hopefully they'll help fix the ridiculous thing that is my face. Then my mom and I stopped by the little clothing store next door and I ended up buying a huge shredded sweater and a pair of shorts. About an hour after I got home, my friend came over to practice doing my hair and makeup for the photoshoot we'll be doing tomorrow for her senior project. I'm realllly excited for how they're going to turn out!

After she left, I did some homework and watched TV and was basically a lazy bum.

42 / 366

I had a very melancholy sort of day. I wrote a couple of pages in my novel, but that was about it. I was forgotten by my cousins, so I didn't go out like I had been planning. And after a talk with one of my closest guy friends, I decided that the best thing for me to do would be to totally give up on some things because it's a complete waste of my time.

41 / 366

LATE POST. I was way too tired when I got home yesterday to write, especially since I had quite a bit to write about.

School was ... strange. About half of the teachers had taken a sick day in protest of their health insurance or something like that, so I had a substitute in three of my four classes. Apparently some fools decided that they would ditch school "in support of their teachers" when we all know they just wanted a four-day weekend, so the administration that was actually here was cracking down and not letting anyone leave their classrooms even to go to the bathroom, which was not good news for my bladder overall. We ended up doing pretty much nothing meaningful throughout the school day and it was pretty much a waste of time, watching silly movies and documentaries and basically having no reason to be there.

After school ended, I went straight to rehearsals for Asian Showcase and practiced for about four hours before the show actually started. I'm not really sure what specifically went on during that time, but I know that I was intermittently feeling pissed off and dejected and invisible throughout. Haha I actually really hate myself and my lack of significance to anyone lol.

Showcase itself was alright. My ribbon got messed up a couple of times and I totally effed up the ending, but it was funny rather than embarrassing. After we performed and were just chilling backstage, I don't know what happened but it involved crazy dancing and that highonadrenaline feeling and a camera. Lol so I'm definitely going to update this post later whenever the pictures are up on Facebook.

Update: Yeah, I suck at keeping this blog.

Showstopper. Hahahaha.

I wish I could explain what was going on in these pictures, but ... I just can't. I hang with some pretty cool people though. 

(Stole all of these from Rosina!) 

40 / 366

Ironically, when I have more free time I feel less willing to update this blog. However, I do think that if I started something, I might as well finish it, so I'm obliged to keep on forging on.

It was way, way too nice outside for February today. I'm half stoked and half depressed that winter seems to have bypassed us completely because on the one hand, it means that I can start bringing out the shorts soon, and on the other, it means that there will probably be little to no rain in my immediate future. I luv rain. *sigh* Anywho, I had a pretty busy day in school today. It's getting to be crunch time for all kinds of projects and I'm severely behind in all of them. I stayed after school for about an hour for test corrections in an attempt to raise my ill-fated AP Econ grade. I swear that if I drop dead sometime soon for no apparent cause that you can be sure that it was the stress from Econ that did it to me. I had rehearsals at four, but to be honest I hardly remember what went on during that time haha. Lots of Asians. I can't believe showtime is tomorrow already! Cue the stage fright.

My dad picked me up after and we headed first to Dollar Tree and then to Party City where I found a bag of big cheap Easter eggs for my rocket project for physics; I'm trying to decide how I'm going to insulate it so that the real egg it will be holding won't break when it comes down from the rocket launch. Gah I am so glad that it's going to be a three-day weekend. This has kind of been a week from hell.

39 / 366

Alright, I am back on schedule! Unfortunately today was incredibly uneventful. I had quizzes and tests and then wasted my time on the computer when I could have been doing useful things like studying or writing or sumthin, since this will be my only free day until who knows when. WHATEVA.

I am a useless individual.

38 / 366

We had our first Asian Showcase rehearsal today at four, an hour after school. So I killed that hour by going to the Biotech meeting and then just chilling with my peeepz. The rehearsal itself went alright, I think, considering it's the first time all the clubs were coordinating and stuff. It kind of just hit me that I'm going to have to perform in front of like ... people. I haven't done this kind of thing since maybe elementary school haha, I'm getting a little nervous. We'll be alright though, I'm sure.

37 / 366

I am definitely a day behind on this, but I just can't seem to find the time to do anything anymore. Every single day this week I'm going to be so crazy busy it's ridiculous. I have way too much stress on me right now.

So today (yesterday, as I write this) was my last high school academic award. I'm sure it was supposed to be really sentimental and touching and I was supposed to break down and weep because that era is coming to a close, but surprisesurprise -- I didn't. I have never had a pleasant academic awards experience, even though they happen biannually and I got one every time. They just always happened to be days where I clashed really badly with my mom and I've gone to more than one suppressing tears and feeling worthless. It wasn't that bad this time, though, just uneventful.

36 / 366

I woke up way too early at 7:50, not getting my full eight hours wah. I waited for the rest of my family to wake up and get ready, then we went to church and worshipped and communioned and all that. Afterwards, we stopped by Carl's Jr., which in retrospect was probably a really bad idea because later on in the afternoon we went to my cousin's birthday/Superbowl party where they were serving tons of terrible food and yeah. I felt really guilty eating anything, but I continued to do so. And I also drank soda so I semi-hate myself now. 

The Superbowl itself was not even a good game. I was going for the Patriots and therefore made a complete fool of myself yelling at the television while everyone else in the room was celebrating. I'm not even that big of a Patriots fan, but I just hate the feeling of losing haha. So I'm 1 for 3 this weekend for sports events, ugh. My cousins were kind enough to console me with the prospect of going out for Fenton's ice cream next week, so I have made a full recovery! Haha. And after I digested all of that greasy and delicious food I felt a little better because I still adhered to my "no eating after 6" rule and drank a lot of water when I got home. The brand-new zits on my face, however, are a totally different story. 

This weekend was toooo short, and it looks like I'll have no time to rest in the week ahead. Wohooo. 

35 / 366

Started out the day in a foul mood, probably because I had really tormenting dreams the night before. So I was basically hating myself and feeling blah. I promised myself that I would catch up on my novel, buuuuuut ... distractions came in the form of Tumblr and Facebook and just really random browsing that I was doing in order to prolong my procrastination. I only ended up doing less than a thousand words, because at the last minute I decided to call one of my friends and ask if she was going to the basketball game and yeah, we ended up going.

And okay, we lost, but it was only by two points and we were winning for most of the game anyways. I'm still so proud of the boys because they held up against the #3 ranked team in the state! In my opinion they're way overrated, or at least, we're way underrated at #8 if we could take them like that. After the game, I found that I wasn't that mad at myself anymore, even though given the circumstances I probably should be more mad!

34 / 366

I. Love. My. Huskies! There is no better win than a win that occurs within the last two minutes of a game, aaaaaah! The game was hours ago and I'm still freaking out a little because I'm so proud of the boys. We're ranked #1 in the area now, ayeee!

On the down side, I broke a promise to myself today because I got carried away -- which really is no excuse because that would have been a perfect opportunity. SIGH. Kill me now. I was so close, but further away than ever. Why do I do these things to myself? 

33 / 366

I'm operating under the illusion that I have no real homework, so I'm really not doing anything, even though I know that I should be studying and writing and other such boring things. One more day until the weekend! I feel like my weekends are getting shorter; I don't have time to do anything anymore. This is not good.

I felt like a bitch today because I just found myself completely ignoring freshmen who tried to talk to me, and there was all this guilt because I'm such an unkind person. I should probably stop believing I am above all underclassmen and they are not worthy of my precious time because who knows? They might be more than obnoxious brats trying to get on my good side so I can help them out when I grade their tests!

I'm getting more discouraged by the day, boy-wise, and I feel really self-conscious just writing about this haha. Erica = pathetic.

I wish I could just skip the whole school portion of tomorrowwwww. Hurray for actually having plans for afterwards, even if it's just hanging out with friends and going to a basketball game! Okay, and I'm promising myself that, if opportunities present themselves tomorrow, I'm not going to throw them away like last week (but really, knowing me, those promises will be broken). asdjfkl;asjldf; UGH.

32 / 366

Wooooo February. Probably my least favorite month ever because of that whole dreaded Valentine's day thing. Ew. #bittersinglegirlproblems 

I feel like there's just too much information that my teachers are throwing in my direction and I just can't handle it anymore. I'm doing progressively worse in all of my classes; I don't even understand half of what's going on in AP Econ anymore, and it's scary because I'm not used to feeling so incompetent when it comes to academics. I'm stressing out so much, it's not even cool anymore. My brain can only handle so much information at a time before things start slipping through the cracks. I'm sure this will get better in time but for now I'm feeling totally overwhelmed and I don't know what to do. 

On a ~positive~ note, I totally think that this obnoxious freshman in the class that I TA for is trying to hit on me or something so that I'll grade his quizzes easier. Nahhhhh man, nahhhhhh. 

My brief and unexplained era of good humor has, obviously, gone with January. xoxoxoxo 

31 / 366

My hair is getting ridiculous.  

Last day of January! Wow, the beginning of the year seems really long ago. I'll attribute this to my boring ass classes and overall lack of social life.

I'm in a good mood again today. I don't know what's wrong with me, or, I guess, what's right. Well, actually, I do know part of the reason and it's too pathetic to put into words haha. I am all kinds of lame. NEWAY. Today was fairly uneventful; I had tons of work to do in all of my classes. I'm starting to feel like there is just not enough time for me to accomplish anything. We had an earthquake drill in second, that was tons of fun, contorting myself into grotesque shapes to fit under my overcrowded table thing and then having to come within talking distance of the freshman. We played the running game in Gov -- it's always funny seeing how crazy competitive AP kids are over five points extra credit haha.

In other news, I've been listening to way too much sad seventies music - Aubrey by Bread has been stuck in my head for about 72 hours now. This song always makes me want to cry. I guess I'm trying to compensate for my otherwise cheerful demeanor.

30 / 366

Don't know why, but I'm in a pretty good mood today, especially considering that it's only Monday. I was basically just lethargic and tired and bored throughout all of my classes, too. This is pretty weird.

Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

29 / 366

I was so productive today; with the aid of much seventies music, I wrote six pages in my novel today to reach my halfway point of fifty pages! So much proud, so much proud. I'm getting more optimistic about the project as a whole, because now that I'm actually getting into the story I think that I might actually create something that means something to me, not just bullshit which I put on paper to meet a deadline. I have another month of this crazy piled-on stress, and after that I feel like I'm totally going to check out of school completely lol. But yay! I'm feeling all congratulatory and whatnot. I think I might let myself eat tonight!

Also I tried watching some of the ProBowl, but I fell asleep during the second quarter *shame*. Basically yeah, that's all for today. I think maybe I'll go and do some homework or something else productive, while I'm on this ~hot streak~.

28 / 366

I woke up today a little cross with myself for letting opportunities pass me by, but then I talked to my friend and he made me feel a lot better about myself. In his own asshole way he has encouraged me to take risks and go for broke. I don't know if I will, but it's nice that he believes in me anyways. I should also start taking my own advice!

Basically did nothing today. I practiced driving and drove my dad to WinCo (and failed at parking lol). My friend's coming over later, and I promised myself that I would write at least five pages today before she arrived -- I haven't written a single word besides "Chapter Seven." Ah I fail. She's going to be here in thirty minutes but I'm just so braindead. OK I'm gonna stop complaining and just do it.

27 / 366

Please excuse my lack of ass and room cleanliness. Also the picture with my TBWA shirt makes me look like I have rolls of fat lolol.

Didn't have much going on at school today really. Actually, there was pretty much nothing going on, so I'm hoping tonight will be good to make up for it. I'm just chilling at home, waiting for five thirty to roll around so I can head off to the basketball game(s) at school. They're against our rivals, and since we lost horribly during our last football match I'm hoping that we can make up for it in basketball .. since we're actually good at it haha. I'm deliberating on whether or not I want to wear my Teal Black and White Army shirt -- I feel like a child when I wear T-shirts. But the other school called us out and said we have no spirit (which is actually true) so I want to do something without looking like a total ~schoolspirited~ dork!  It's a hard lyfe being ironic.

Day-after update: We won!!!!!!! My palms are literally bruised from clapping so much. It feels so good to beat those cocky mother effers at something while we chanted rude things from our side of the court haha. Soooo proud of the boys. Although I'm pretty mad at myself for being so cautious and not taking opportunities that presented themselves to me afterwards, ugh. I need to just stop being scared or move the hell along.

26 / 366

I don't think anyone really gets my complete and utter hatred of ants. My day was starting out totally fine, and then BAM. As I was doing my makeup I noticed one ant. Then two. And I followed the line and found that they had all decided to congregate in my bathroom and bedroom. UGH. I really don't know why they feel the need to come shelter in my room; it's cold and there's no food there. But I waged an all-out war on them and managed to kill the majority, though I have taken no chances and am sheltering in my parents' room for now.

I discovered today that the boy I sit next to in Physics not only a smart-aleck, but a gassy smart aleck. Fun times.

25 / 366

I literally have no idea where the audience for this blog comes from. Looking through the statistics that Blogger gives me, all the referring sites are like shady and random. Lol that's cool I guess.

I wish I had something interesting to talk about today. Hm ... I got a really bad score on my Econ test from yesterday? Hurray. School always starts late on Wednesdays so I got to sleep in and catch up on sleep, which is good. Uh. Oh, we had a seat change in Physics so now I have to sit by someone who quite honestly annoys me, and my lab group is different  now :'c It's upsetting. I had ribbon practice after school and now ...... I'm here, about to start working on my senior project. I think that's about it, unless you'd like to read about the horrors of my menstrual cycle. So yeah.

24 / 366

I have obviously lost my mind. I'm so tired. All of this stress from my classes and my senior project is making me lose sleep and I guess I'm coping with that by sleeping in my classes and taking copious amounts of unnecessary pictures of myself. I'm trying to think of anything ~eventful~ from today but there was really nothing, other than my above-mentioned sleeping and I don't think you want to hear about that. So I'll end this and go work on my novel.

23 / 366

I'm feeling stressed out and ugly and tired today. I had very little sleep last night because of the storm; I'm not used to rain anymore. Now I'm trying to catch up on all of my rapidly-approaching deadlines and I kind of feel like crying. Everything sucks.

23 / 366

Awww look at me back when I had hope for the future :'c Welllll the Niners lost in a game that almost gave me a heart attack, so this post is in memory of their otherwise-amazing season. I totally thought they could make it to the Super Bowl this year too. So sad. In other news, I went to church today then went to eat pho with the family and ran into a bunch of extended "family" there. The end.

PS. I need to start investing in my own merch instead of using my dad's stuff from the nineties haha.

21 / 366

L-O-L well it was my last high school homecoming dance ever, however ... literally no good pictures were taken, so this is just a video of fail.

Two of my friends came over to get ready, the plan being that we would meet up with the others at the dance. What we didn't know -- although we had guessed -- was that our other friend, who had been telling us that she  wouldn't be able to go at all for the past week, actually came; so yeah that was a not-so-surprising surprise. The dance itself was really average. The DJ sucked, especially in the beginning when he literally stopped the music and everyone was just standing there for like ten minutes waiting for him to get his shit together. Also, there was nobody there; it was all underclassmen and maybe a handful of seniors besides ourselves.

On the plus side, once the good music actually started playing and we could actually start getting into it I had fun. There was the typical sweaty-strangers(and some accidental and unpleasant nonstrangers)-grinding-on-you experiences, but that's fairly standard at homecoming, really. I guess it was blacklight and lazers and overall psychadelic strobe light themed, so it was kind of like being at a really shitty rave. Also I discovered that I might be part vampire, as my friends considerably pointed and screamed in terror that my eyes were glowing creepily in the blacklight for no apparent reason. Oh god and I just looked it up on Google and I am now terrified of the possibilities of cataracs or diabetes (although, since I'm Filipino, the diabetes thin gis not too surprising). ANYWAYS. So yeah, that was homecoming. My legs hurt. Partyin partyin.

20 / 366

Oh, how I wish I had a good camera. I have a Kodak but it's pretty much the most basic camera in existence and it takes terrible pictures, so even though I take it whenever I go places I end up leaving it in my bag and letting other people with better cameras do it instead. Nobody has uploaded any from last night yet, though, so here, have this terrible cell phone shot of my outfit. I might cheat later and add more to this post whenever I get the chance to steal.

It was my friend's birthday yesterday, so after school we all went out to eat and then watched Underworld: Awakening in 3D -- rated R in honor of her seventeenth birthday! Lots of overfull stomachs and insane laughter at dinner haha. Then some of us went to the movies and spent an hour or so in the arcade being foolish while waiting for the thing to start. The movie was alright, but I tend to fall asleep during action films anyways so I guess I'm not the best judge for that. It was an overall good tiiiiiime though! Love my friends <3

Update: Is it bad that I'm finally putting the pictures more than a month later? Stolen from Chaz (:

Atractivo.